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So if you want to stand any chance of getting intimate with each other again, you’ve got to find the time – and know-how on his part to communicate properly. Don’t think this means blocking out an entire weekend; research shows that couples who talk to each other for 20 minutes a day are 75% happier than those who don’t.
Set strict rules. Take it in turns to talk, and the person who is talking can only chat about themselves, not the other person or the relationship. They must focus on their emotions, their needs and how they cope or don’t cope with their feelings. The idea is to help you understand each other, so the person listening is not allowed to comment on what’s been said for 24 hours – and then only with positive comments. If they see a problem, they must suggest a
solution and they’re not allowed to criticise the other person’s thoughts.
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